Vitamin A...

...mbien.

Know what I mean?

February 27, 2006 | 11:21 PM | Link | 1 comments

My newest kitchen tool.

February 25, 2006 | 2:47 PM | Link | 6 comments

48.

I spend a lot of time hating myself.

February 25, 2006 | 12:20 AM | Link | 4 comments

A silent day.

Today seemed intensely quiet. It wasn't still, and it wasn't boring. It was just so very quiet.

Everyone was busy. The mood didn't seem right to play any music. We just worked away. I had requests coming in on the work chat system left and right, phone calls to join, tasks to complete, meetings being scheduled and changed... yet the whole day seemed silent.

Even as I sit here at home, there is no sound. I slowly sip my beverage, and I rest in front of my computer, as if waiting.

February 21, 2006 | 10:38 PM | Link | 8 comments

Bitter.

I'm tired of Welch's Grape Juice commercials. Fucking puffy-cheeked cute little kids.

February 20, 2006 | 8:13 PM | Link | 2 comments

Dentist Appointment

I am so looking forward to my dentist appointment on Wednesday. Like, I can't even describe! I think I'll tell her to take her time with the drilling. Oh and my night guard: I'll tell them to take all the time they want in making sure it fits just right.

February 20, 2006 | 4:02 PM | Link | 0 comments

Temporary fix.

On the drive into work, I felt like I was going to explode. Really, just so much happening inside that I felt like I could melt at any moment. Suddenly, a fond memory popped into my head.

It was a day when I was expecting great news. I was prepared, perhaps not to receive all I wanted, but a great portion of it at least. When the news actually came, I was severely disappointed. It felt like a great jab in the gut.

I went to the record store and told the guy who worked there that I needed some music that would help me get out some of my anger, stress, frustration. He immediately recommended Diamanda Galás' Malediction and Prayer. He told me to start it on track 2, The Thrill is Gone.

I bought the CD, put it in my car, and pressed play on the second track. Erratic piano began coursing into my ears. Uneasy, caustic tempo. Then, 55 seconds into the track, my anger began to fade away. Her screams were like a much needed heroin break (or so I've heard). I turned my car around, walked back into the record store, and thanked the guy for recommending such a brilliant release.

So on the drive to work this morning, iPod in tow, I selected that wonderful track. 55 seconds in, and I had a huge smile on my face. For the next 5 minutes, all my anxiety, fears, frustration, and sadness seemed a distant memory. I'll always be grateful for people like Diamanda Galás, who know how to turn pain into beauty.

February 20, 2006 | 8:56 AM | Link | 3 comments

Oh those crazy South Americans.

Wooden statue of Homer in Argentina

February 19, 2006 | 10:40 PM | Link | 1 comments

The dentist will make me all better.

On Wednesday I get my night guard to stop this dang grinding that's been more and more frequent. I can't wait to talk like a teenage girl with braces!

The weird thing is, I don't grind my teeth in the classic sense, but I "skip" my teeth to whatever tune is going on in my head. Right now, that tune is the song played by ice cream trucks.

February 19, 2006 | 10:14 PM | Link | 0 comments

Anxiety.

I've got loads of it right now.

February 19, 2006 | 9:13 PM | Link | 0 comments

Wait... come to think of it...

I'm sitting here watching E! True Hollywood Stories about reality TV shows. That really kinda sad. Does that mean I'm going to stop watching? No.

Also, when I went to pick the category that this post falls under, I saw my "adventures" category. I don't know when the last time was I actually used that category. I know, boo fucking hoo, right?

February 19, 2006 | 10:10 AM | Link | 0 comments

Urine Gone

So, there's this commercial for a product called Urine Gone. The product is described as having enzymes with "an appetite for urine." I seriously thought is was a fake commercial on a sketch comedy show when I first saw it, but this shit is real.

They even give you a "scientific blacklight" which you can use to hunt out urine in your home. Rad.

February 19, 2006 | 10:01 AM | Link | 1 comments

It canceled itself out.

So, I've still been in a pretty low mood this morning. I really wasn't feeling up to gymnastics. I knew I would go there, have no energy to put forth, and then come home even more down that I wasted my and Sean's time. Just my luck, I guess, that Sean called needing to cancel today's lesson.

So now I get to stay in bed watching E True Hollywood Stories and every once in a while sitting in my new stretching machine.

February 19, 2006 | 9:53 AM | Link | 0 comments

Dr. Pill

Goddammit! I just had to sit through another stupid Match.com Dr. Phil commercial. Life sucks.

February 18, 2006 | 10:25 PM | Link | 0 comments

Live, from New York.

I've always loathed that phrase, but somehow, coming from Carolyn's mouth, it made me so happy. I love Carolyn. Even though no season since the very fist Apprentice has been really worth watching (I mean, HELLO Bill Rancic, right???).

Oh, and speaking of Calrolyns, how much do we love the movie Pumpkin?!

February 18, 2006 | 10:17 PM | Link | 0 comments

My stomach hurts.

I am so upset that I am forced to spend time watching Dr. Phil on Match.com commercials so often. I detest that donkey-man!

February 18, 2006 | 9:04 PM | Link | 0 comments

I want to be a celebrity endorser.

So often, I just feel so empty.

Where do I get the decisions I make? Why am I such a timid motherfucker? Then, there's the question I'm always asking myself: Why am I so content being so discontent?

Oh, and the title of this post had nothing to do with the post itself. I just couldn't think of one and didn't feel like putting forth the effort.

February 18, 2006 | 5:43 PM | Link | 0 comments

Kepping my sanity, and my promise.

This morning, my client (sounding very pleased with my work) asked if he could send some business my way. I asked that he not at this point, simply for the reason that I am so busy, I'm not sure about taking on any more work. I felt bad to do this, but I know it was the right thing.

I'm sure in the future, if my situation changes, I can go back to him and say "OKAY NOW GO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT ME GODDAMMIT!" Yeah, I can totally do that.

February 13, 2006 | 9:20 PM | Link | 2 comments

I'm in Florida.

+

=

February 13, 2006 | 8:57 PM | Link | 4 comments

Slow burn.

Something I promised myself a while ago was that I would never again overwork myself as hard as I was when I felt the need to create this promise. Lately, and my friends will know this, I have come dangerously close to those old feelings of panic and breakdown.

At gymnastics this morning (a sport I had formerly given up due to excess work, but only realized that after the fact) I felt extremely tired. Did I go out last night? No. Did I have a drink to myself last night? No. Did I do anything that would cause me such exhaustion? Well, yes: Work.

Even as I stood in the gym, surrounded by the world I so adore as an escape—the toys of my life, I felt bitter that I wasn't able to use that two-hour block as "free time." I was actually angry to be flying through the air, working to advance my grasp of my favorite pass-time.

Right then, I made a new promise to myself: Sometime within the next few weeks, keep that promise about working too much.

February 12, 2006 | 11:33 PM | Link | 1 comments

Okay, so I do have to admit.

I find Madonna's marketing highly exciting. I really enjoy how, for the last few albums at least, she would reinvent her image for each single that was released. Her look would tie into the video would tie into the album sleeve would tie into the promotions. Branding identity so thorough and well-played that I can't help but respect the hell out of it.

That said, I had been very excited to see where here look would go for the second single. I just saw the video, and realized the answer should have been obvious. The album is of such a tight theme that naturally, the look from Hung Up continues. The video even seems to pick right up where Hung Up, well, hung up.

I wonder, though, if she will gradually modernize her look with each single until she is brought out of the 70's and into the now. Could be pretty cool. Then to have all of the videos back-to-back in the order they were released? Neat!

Oh, and I must stress. I'm not a Madonna fanatic. I'm a branding fanatic. Totally.

February 9, 2006 | 9:57 PM | Link | 2 comments

Aged.

Harrison Ford was so hot as Indiana Jones. Gravity SO sucks.

Oh, and Michael Stipe was always scary, but now he's SUPER scary.

February 9, 2006 | 12:59 AM | Link | 0 comments

Memories of Argentina.

I just ate a cookie from Argentina. Alfajores Havanna. They are so, so, so, so good. They are like big sweet cloud caramel dense rich but somehow not too sweet. After that, I remembered Freddo: the best ice cream in the world. Eating Freddo is like giving heroin to your taste buds. It's like your mouth's wet dream, but with slightly less protein.

Um, Argentina was so yummy!

February 7, 2006 | 9:36 PM | Link | 0 comments

Capping off a week from hell.

What a shitty week it had been. I got two speeding tickets. I went to the dentist, and was told I should get a night guard, and then that I had a cavity. Stocks were still tanking. My wallet was not happy. Work was hell. I was too busy to get anything done for myself. I was near breaking point by the end of the week. I felt like I was close to the same space I was in before when I had a bit of a breakdown. I just knew there was so much to get done, and not possibly enough time to get it all done.

The weekend was nice. After getting through the preparations for Janelle's birthday party, I got to relax. I calmed my stresses by dipping strawberries and dried figs in chocolate (dried figs + dark chocolate = crazy delicious!). Charley, Frank, and Joel came down for the night, and I was excited to see them all.

I didn't party very hard, as I knew I would need to drive at some point in the evening. I'd had one drink at the start of the night, but nothing more. By midnight, I wasn't feeling too well. My stomach felt pretty off.

I woke up the next morning feeling alright, but it was when we got to breakfast that the nausea really set in. I could barely look at my food. I felt like I would vomit from just the smell of the plates around me. I went to the bathroom several times ready to puke, but that accomplished nothing more than to make the other patrons think I was a power bulimic.

We came home, and the boys set off for LA. I went to sleep for the next couple of hours. I awoke with my stomach in pain. I still felt like I needed to hurl, but it still hadn't happened. I'm not one to induce vomiting, even when I know it will make me feel better. I just really, really hate throwing up.

Long story short (too late), a couple hours later, I had my head over the toilet. I puked up all that was left of my breakfast. I felt better for a couple of minutes, but I couldn't really stand up. Janelle made me some tea, but I was having a hard enough time keeping that down. I tried to watch a movie to take my mind off my stomach, but before too long, I was back in the bathroom. Then, not long after that, I was back again... and again. In total I threw up/dry heaved five times.

Even after going to sleep after one session, I'd be woken up under an hour later with the need to expel more. Each time, I'd be left with a cold sweat, a green pallor, and slight dizziness. Melodramatic as I always get when I'm sick, I was sure that last night was the end. I was ready to call an ambulance. The only thing that stopped me was the fact that all the other times I knew I was dying, I turned out to be wrong.

February 6, 2006 | 5:04 PM | Link | 2 comments

My brain is fried.

My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.
My brain is fried.

Seriously.