Life, the universe, and everything


I just bought tickets online to see The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy with some friends tonight, and the total came to $42. :) How delightfully fitting.

April 29, 2005 | 6:46 PM | Link | 1 comments








Things my friend said last night


"...and when it was finally my turn to get off, he started spanking me. I was like 'Finally! Thank you.'"

Followed shortly after with...

"Sometimes when I go pee there's glitter on my dick."

Oh, the new Nine Inch Nails album kicks dick! Buy it!

April 29, 2005 | 5:01 PM | Link | 0 comments








Date from hell


Remember when I wrote about that great first date? Well, we had another date last night and it was horrible. I do not wish to continue seeing this man. No sir.

At the end of the date, when I took him home, I wanted badly to reach over, open his passenger door, and yell "GET OUT!"

Issues? I think he's got a lifetime subscription. He wasn't very nice or considerate. He was just the opposite of what I like about people. Wait, do I like anything about people? I don't know. Probably something. Whatever.

So, I got home and started drinking Jäger straight from the bottle. Worry not, it was in the freezer. Warm Jäger is the stuff of nightmares in persian brothel restrooms (don't ask). The cold black licorice kept me happy, and I chatted with my new friend Taylor... so the night turned the fuck around.

Ack! He just called! Voicemail to the rescue!

Tonight I'm going to see h2g2 again, then go down to Tijuana to see a dear old friend. Tonight will rock. Cheers :)

April 29, 2005 | 12:50 PM | Link | 0 comments








Unattached


My internet connection is horrible. I can't really complain though, since it isn't really "my" internet connection. Three cheers for wireless, I say.

It's been nearly three years since my last relationship. It's amazing how time flies. I just haven't been able to really open up since the last one. It's strange.

There's this new guy who I think I really like, but I think since I realized I scare people off, I've been very reserved with him. Well, apart from running away from a cab in the middle of the night on our first date, I've been right next to prudish.

April 26, 2005 | 9:47 PM | Link | 0 comments








So... now what am I supposed to live for?


The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book, it was a disastrous BBC television series, and it is also a pretty good movie.

Though it wasn't without flaws, pacing and performance-wise, it is full of imagination and humorous creativity. There were some omissions which are unfortunate, but there was already so much going on in the movie I'm glad they decided to cut some fat.


Zaphod Beeblebrox is the new Casey Spooner.

Probably the most unfortunate omission is the explanation for the paddles that whack the Heart of Gold crew in their faces on the planet Vogsphere. Without explanation, they seem like random slapstick. Since they aren't in the book, people watching the movie never know why they exist, and why they pop up and punish anyone who has an independent thought. Just trust me: the explanation exists. It's very Douglas Adams and very brilliant. Hopefully it will make its way back into the movie for the DVD release.

All in all I really enjoyed this movie. The Guide itself is excellent. Sam Rockwell as Zaphod is exactly how he should be; cocky, obnoxious, yet lovable. You can laugh at him on screen, but if you knew him in real life you'd want to sock him in one of his jaws. The Vogons are very well done. I think Adams would be happy.

I'll see the movie again on Friday, I presume... and then again, and again to let it fully digest. If you see the movie, and you're unfamiliar with the books or the story, I'd love to know what you thought as well.

April 26, 2005 | 9:49 AM | Link | 1 comments








Restraint.


There's so much I want to say this morning, but I'll wait until my mind is clear before I do.

Let's just say that at this very moment, for whatever reason, I'm not a happy man.

April 22, 2005 | 12:10 AM | Link | 0 comments








Please don't suck


In five days I get to see the movie made from my favorite book! Now I know how the Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings geeks feel. Totally. Except I probably have way more sex than any of them.

I so hope it's good! Special thanks to D for all the mad hookups he's provided me with this film. Like getting to see this movie before all y'all!

April 20, 2005 | 8:53 PM | Link | 2 comments








Slightly puffy


I was watching Cops the other night, and I saw a black guy with his hair only half done up in corn rows. The other half was still an afro, and it was the most wonderful thing I'd ever seen!

April 13, 2005 | 9:53 PM | Link | 6 comments








25 reasons to travel light


I just realized that I'll be turning 25 while vacationing in Argentina. That's fun. I'm going to be a rich white man in the third world, and that totally gets me hard.

April 13, 2005 | 9:48 PM | Link | 0 comments








Vomit


For some reason I've been fixated on the thought of obtaining a collection of photographs of people throwing up. I'm not sure what it is. I mean, it's not sexual. I just find it terribly amusing and interesting.

What do I look like when I throw up? What do you look like when you throw up? What does Christina Aguilera look like when she throws up?

April 13, 2005 | 9:42 PM | Link | 4 comments








23-24-23: A regression, of sorts


Since I was 17, I wanted to be 23. I just loved the number, and still do. When 23 came along, I knew I couldn't waste it. I straightened my tie, pretty much gave up partying, paid off all my debt, became a work-a-holic, et cetera.

For my 24th birthday, I treated myself to a lengthy trip to NYC. It was my reward for depriving myself of so much in the previous year.

Well, with 24 already more that half gone, I got tired of playing the serious business guy and hating life. That's when all the champagne came into play.

I'm happy to say that I'm enjoying myself much more thoroughly these days. I'm working less, and as a result actually enjoying myself most of the time (thanks for the advice, F.). I act irresponsibly because god-dammit I deserve it and who else is going to do that thing I do to the hooker's body?

Where was I? I don't know.

I'm bored with pot, so I'm back to drinking. My liver is clean and screaming for help. I drown out its cries with more liquor, and we're all happy... Oh! I remember! The whole point of this post was to mention how I feel like I'm actually stepping back to who I was over a year ago, and I think that's a good thing. It's like how people always say they wish they could go back to high school, only with the knowledge they have now.

I'm totally going down on entire wrestling team this time!

April 13, 2005 | 9:26 PM | Link | 0 comments








Oh, sweet nectar. How I love thee.


This entry shall be wrapped in the vibrant, inviting red that is known as PMS 485—or, for all general purposes: Coca-Cola Red. It looks different on my site than it does on Coca-Cola's site since they adjusted for typical monitor settings. I'm a seasoned graphic designer who doesn't believe in color management.

So, PMS 485 it is.

Anyway. The reason I'm wrapping my words in this lush red is to celebrate the amount of Coca-Cola I've had recently. Well, Diet Coke really. I don't much care for Coke, but I love the diet variety. And I also love the Paula Abdul of yore.

Straight up now, baby. Do you really wanna host that show forever? Oh, oh, oh.

What was I saying? Oh, yes! Diet Coke.

I love Diet Coke, and I drink a lot of it. I sometimes drink it at breakfast. I typically drink it at lunch (commonly followed with an afternoon sip or two). And also as I'm having it now: with Stoli Vanil.

Yes, those marketing execs just didn't understand that in order for vanilla to really sell (to my demographic1), it has to be of the alcoholic variety. I should know. I'm a marketing genius!


1: 7 to 82 year-old non-committal homosexual alcohol-friendly atheist pothead sexually-deviant emotionally-detached males.

April 12, 2005 | 10:00 PM | Link | 2 comments








Too busy


I'm recuperating from a goddamned busy week.

Rafa and I met up with Cesar, Brent, Samantha, Marcos, and Juan last night for drinks. What's become typical San Diego behavior these days, it began raining. It's okay, I always keep my Gaultier umbrella in my car.

I had the most disgusting glass of champagne. Well, I took two sips and then set it back on the bar. It was, by all means, grotesque. I had to wash my mouth out with Jack in the Box.

I'm going to go to Beunos Aires in September (coincidentally, the trip falls on my birthday—and that wasn't planned). That should be cool. It'll be my first time off the continent, or even in another country. Tijuana doesn't count... but then when does Tijuana count?

April 9, 2005 | 11:16 AM | Link | 3 comments








How do you spell "barf" in a way that tells it was made of paella and vodka?


Yesterday was the first day of a large WW meeting of my group at work. Presentations were presented, exercises were taken, and finally, the drinkin' began.

I am pretty damn hung over this morning, bitchy that I have to go attend another full day of that meeting... And I have three presentations to give today!


Great, now I just got over a dry heaving spell caused by brushing my teeth. Pretty.


I am SO going to bed the moment I get home tonight.

April 6, 2005 | 7:08 AM | Link | 4 comments








Patience


I must wait, but I don't want to. I just want this whole ordeal to be over. I wake up every morning looking for signs that it's done with, but to no avail.

Ever wish you were a dictator; what you said goes? I do. And I would be damn good at it too! Shiiiit.

April 4, 2005 | 7:12 AM | Link | 0 comments








Hippies suck, and that has nothing to do with anything


The cabbie dropped us off in front of my friend's house after having gone very far in the wrong direction. We'd told him three times which way to go, but he didn't listen. It should have been a $16 ride, but it came out to $30. I handed him a $20, figuring I was being nice, and we got out of the car.

We walked a bit, and he slowly followed us. We stopped, he stopped. We continued, he continued.

Jason turns to me and says, "Now, run!" So we jam, drunk, with this cab screeching after us in this quiet little residential area at 2am. We suddenly change directions, and he throws his cab into reverse—fucker was chasing us in reverse! We keep running, and he gets his car turned around. At that moment, we quickly change direction again. We run around a curve and hide behind some bushes on the side of am unsuspecting house. We're quietly laughing because we can't believe we're going all Harrison Ford from a crappy cab driver.

He pulls back around, looking for us; slowly driving around the curve. Jason checks the gate on the side of this house, and we go into their backyard. Conveniently, if we hop their fence, we're back on Jason's street. We creep out, and see the cab coming 'round again. Persistent fucker, I'll give him that. After just a little more drunken hiding, we make a mad dash across the road and into Jason's house.

Would you consider that a good first date? I sure do, fo sho!

April 3, 2005 | 8:09 PM | Link | 4 comments








Bye bye, Samantha


My slutty sister Samantha is moving away today. Off to LA, and then to New York. I'll miss you like I miss the burning sensation and outbreaks!

April 1, 2005 | 11:29 AM | Link | 2 comments